24.May.2011 Man, Things Sure are Boring…
"So…Big Gulps, Huh?" –Lloyd Christmas
Is there anything worth discussing? Not really. Maybe the only thing worth discussing is how there is nothing worth discussing. Slow times or something greater?
Can't say I'm intrigued by even the baseball team right now. Maybe that will change by the end of the week, but it looks like the Beavs will be hosting a regional whether they sweep or get swept by Oregon. Well, maybe not if they get swept, but with one win. That means there's nothing too exciting for a couple weeks.
I guess I'll use this down time to mention something that's been bothering me. It has to do with Mike Parker and booze. There, fair warning…if that topic either bores or offends you: stop reading and leave now!
Okay, so basically, I am having a doubly hard time listening to Parker since the napkin incident. Everyone knows I hate his "should have been out of the inning" and "what if" subjunctive mood pontifications. But my latest gripe with Mike isn't due to his mentally draining homerisms. No, it's about the booze and the napkin. It's not that I believe drinking booze and eating napkins are horrible offenses or foibles. My friends drink. Squirrels and pandas gnaw on tree bark, and I love both just fine. It's that in the past, when things didn't go well for the Beavers, I could dismiss the dejection in Parker's voice, but now when I hear that dejection I take notice and have an emotional reaction. I think, "Wow, he is so depressed about that missed bunt, he's probably going to get hammered ex post ballgame because of it." This is not what a listener wants to think or feel during a game. I don't like to imagine a 60 year old man lurching and hurling because teenagers and small-town life have left a cavern in his soul. Listening to such a person makes me depressed.
I just can't stand knowing a guy is a sad sap. It changes everything for me. It's why I don't want pictures or information about anyone who reads this blog. The less information, the better. The less information, the more I can believe you're an upstanding citizen who doesn't lurch and hurl.
And full disclosure: I drink about zero times per month. Essentially quit cold turkey after the football season when I began to feel the buzz just wasn't as good as it used to be. But yeah, during football season, historically I have three cocktails while watching the game, and I write things like "load up on the gin, boys" on the blog. But, I've enjoyed sobriety so much that I might not even do that this year.
Okay, glad I got that off my chest. Talk about anything you want since there's really not much to talk about. (Prediction for the first comment: "WE NEED A POWERFUL BRAND"). Lol…